Monday at 3:45

An email that was sent to email address. The follow are the words of Aimee Myers.

On Monday at 3:45, I parked my car behind the Walmart Market on 4th street. Wearing my work shoes and skirt, I stepped out into a thick layer of mud and a fog of chaos. I looked down Eastern Ave and knew I had to walk through emergency vehicles and downed power lines to get to my son's in-home daycare.

I made it further down the street and saw entire blocks of houses shredded; my walk became a run. Not a block beyond this destruction, my little guy sat in a state of blissful ignorance swinging his little feet from a chair on the front porch of a house that stood mostly untouched. His only recognition of my terror was that there was a storm, and it was really hungry. He said he could hear it growling as it ate things outside the house.

I informed him we would have to walk a long ways to get to mommy's car, and it is very dangerous, so he would need to stay very close. I carried him as long as I could, but he was a ball of energy due to his excitement of getting to see all the "good guys" everywhere (police officers).

As I held his tiny 2 year old hand in mine, I wanted to feel joy and gratitude that he was safe. But I was being crushed with the heavy sadness and despair around me. I realized I had his squirmy little body in my arms while jumping over downed power lines together like super heroes, but other parents were experiencing the darkest grief. Other families were still looking for loved ones or walking around in a stupor covered in mud.

For days I had no clue how to process this dark dichotomy of feelings. I was able to kiss all three of my children before bedtime. I hugged them so many times they were sick of me. Every time I slipped into my clean sheets or read a book to my children, I felt sad or guilty.

Friday afternoon I walked into the Serve Moore headquarters. We were put in trailers and worked in homes helping clear debris for families in the same neighborhood I had to walk through to get to my son. I was given a task and a purpose to help victims deal with this darkness. By helping them find the light, I found mine. There were groups of people everywhere eager to help with nothing in return. I looked around and saw God in every face I encountered. God has not left Moore. He was right there in that moment for me, and I knew He never left. - Aimee Myers